We live in a house that’s about a hundred years old (give or take). The positives of this are beautiful details: gorgeous original hardwood floors, vintage metal kitchen cabinets, & charming screened-in porches. Basically, this house is nothing like our first home (which we owned & was brand-new with every modern convenience), but it’s also not anything like the ghetto house we rented when we first moved here (which was tiny with low ceilings [resulting in claustrophobia], & where we heard gunshots across the street from time to time). Honestly, it’s the perfect rental home in which to spend the next year & a half while Michael finishes grad school. It’s a nice size, there are trees everywhere, & I feel safe at night.
But a 100-year-old house is not without its share of problems, such as being extremely cold & drafty in the winter. We’ve spent much of this winter running a space heater & bundling up under blankets, never without our socks, sweats, & slippers. We have been introduced to some unusual methods of blocking drafts, & hold our breath every time we open an energy bill.
Another luxury I had previously taken for granted was a dishwasher. In our first home, we had a lovely stainless steel model. I would barely scrape the food from our dinner plates, then let the dishwasher do all the work. Now, we wash everything by hand, which leads us to be very resourceful while cooking and eating. Like using the same spoon for everything while cooking. Using napkins as plates. And making your morning coffee mug your designated drinking glass for the day. Not to mention my creative method of pre-washing dishes, AKA Pancho & Leia. While at my parents’ house this Christmas, I did a few loads of dishes. I remember in high school, my mom had to beg, scream, & plead for us to do the dishes. Now, it’s practically a PARTY to do the dishes with the aid of a dishwasher. If you have a dishwasher, take time every day to count your blessings.
I was telling my dad over the holidays that I’m thankful we have this time in our lives. Before Michael decided to go back to grad school, we had two incomes & a pretty-near perfect house with all the trimmings. Yet I rarely thought of it that way. I compared myself to others who had more money, bigger homes, & nicer things. Not always, but sometimes. And I certainly never stopped and gave thanks for my dishwasher. Now, we’re down to one income, and constantly trying to be creative, both with dishwashing and finances.
Kerri wrote a post about embracing: the highs and the lows, the successes with the failures. And I thought, what a great idea. How easy is it to embrace the highs? Very. How often do we embrace the lows just as equally? Speaking personally, never. And yet, without the lows and the failures, the highs & the successes wouldn’t seem quite so wonderful, because we’d have nothing to gauge them against.
This year, I’m challenging myself to embrace the lows & the failures. The bottom of the barrel. The perpetual sink of dirty dishes. Because, one day, I’ll have a dishwasher again. While it doesn’t feel like it, this is a very short time in our lives. When it is over & we move on to bigger & better things, I hope I always remember the time we spent in this little brown house, with less money and no dishwasher, & stop to give thanks. What once was something I barely noticed will be a shining reminder of simpler, poorer times. And that high will feel just a little higher by comparison.
Comments on On old homes & dishwashers.
From Amy --- Just A Titch:
At one time in my life, I lived in a scary studio apartment with no dishwasher, could barely pay my bills and was generally in Sad Spirits. Every month when I pay my bills, even when I don’t have quite as much money as I’d like, I remember that time and feel so grateful for how far I’ve come, not just in living arrangement but in spirit and life. It’s a good reminder.
From Meghan:
I do very muchly miss having a dishwasher with the whole of my heart, but honestly, I do feel like I am more of a domestic goddess after I finish a monster pile of dishes.
At least it justifies the glass of wine that I allow myself after. Oh, and it’s another excuse to wear a cute apron. :)
From Taryn M. Peine:
My first apartment was like your first rental house out there, and even though all of my stuff had to be fumigated when I moved out to get rid of the curry smell, I will always treasure my memories of that place. You guys will look back and laugh when you’re old and gray and rich! But P & L will always want to lick your dishes. I have a dishwasher and Truman licks all of mine :-)
From Cio:
<3
the house is pretty cool.
Please tell me we will be incorporating it in our
photo shoot WHEN I finally get to come see you.
I promise I'll see you before you leave that place. lol It's my New Years Res.
On a much smaller scale (smaller cause it's only me), I know what it's like to be living it up, and not know it, to being dirt poor you're like okay…Cereal.AGAIN.
A financial expert once said "You've got to live like no one else, so later you can LIVE like no one else." I sure hope he's right.
Love you both. So happy you're enjoying the house. :)
From Kristina A.:
This is such a great post! I have to remember these words when we move and I may possibly find us with only one income, in a new place, a new baby, and maybe no dishwasher! It’s a scary thought that keeps me up at night but it will only make us stronger! :)
From Tabaitha:
Great post! I understand what you mean about conviences. Right before we moved our garbage disposal busted, which happened to be linked to the dishwasher. I had to wash everything by hand and dry it. My hands were cracked and I hated every minute of it. Once we got it fixed, I was so thrilled to do dishes and remember telling my husband how grateful I am that we have the conviences of appliances and didn’t grow up 100 years ago.
From tillie:
fantastic post! I will say it takes me going home {meaning where I grew up} to realize how wonderful I have it now. Dishwashers are for sure a luxury!!
From storytimewithnicole:
I.LOVE.IT.
That is all.
From JBBurrows:
Great post Lauren. You have just proven a truth that many never learn. God provides us “Pure Pleasure” for us with what He provides. The truth I speak of is looking at the current circumstances with a positive outlook rather than focusing on the negative. I can see the love you have for your husband and home…and that is the positive I speak of. I pray for God’s blessings on both of you each day of your life.
From Valerie:
I have to commend you for having such a wonderful, frown-up, worldly attitude about your situation. I wouldn’t even classify this time in your life as a low because in the grand scheme of things your family is taking this time to better yourselves and gain a higher education. What is low about that?! I just know that you two will look back on these days as happy times down the road.
And I agree with Meghan – find yourself an awesome apron and some latex gloves for those dishes and make it an event!
From Kathleen:
Is that your house? Because it’s adorable.
From zburrows:
Great Post. I can always count on you to see the positive. I dont have a dishwasher either (which is ironic because I felt so sad for you when you found out you wouldnt have one). You and Michael will be stronger for this time in your life. I know that because I have lived it. Keep taking moments to appreciate youre life and keep telling us… because we all need to be reminded to be grateful.
From Heather:
You are so right…Someday you will have the big perfect house again. Living with less teaches you to appreciate the simple things in life…
We are in a tiny cramped condo and I get so envious when I see people with big perfect homes. But we also live in the city of Chicago where a big perfect home costs at least half a million dollars.
It forces me to appreciate a roof over my head and I know that someday we will live in a bigger place. It might never be a house (if we stay in Chicago), but it will be bigger. It’s hard not to compare to others sometimes and get depressed!
Sorry this got all rambling…GOOD POST!
From THEStephanie:
Wonderful post, Lauren. And I always love hearing my parents talk about their first homes and how they made it by on what they did.
It’s so important to be thankful for what we have and not always hoping for what we don’t. Thanks for the reminder. :)
From Melissa:
Oh dishwashers, how I dream of thee… I haven’t had a home with a dishwasher since I moved out for university. When it’s a $100+ difference in rent, the luxury of a dishwasher is the first to go. I too dream of the day when a machine cleans my dishes again.
From Kara:
I started living without a dishwasher when Kyle and I bought our townhouse and moved into it in September. Oh appliance of dishwashing glory, how I miss thee!
We’re trying to figure out how to fit an apartment-sized one into our kitchen if/when we renovate it.
I’ve been very fortunate in my life and have had more ups than downs, and I hope it stays that way, but you never know what life may throw at you.
From Lauren Swonke:
When we first bought our house it didn’t have a dishwasher. We went without one for 2 years..until some precious friends came and installed the one that we’d been holding on to in storage, waiting to have the extra cashola to hire someone to do it. I thank God almost every single time I load the dishwasher–not an exaggeration. You are so right–doing without makes you so much more thankful when you’re able to do with–a dishwasher that is.
From Suburban Sweetheart:
I like this post a lot, & this is something I try very hard to do. I went sort of crazy a few years ago – depressed, out-of-my-mind, drive-into-oncoming-traffic crazy. I was miserable, but I was also never so creative, never wrote words so beautiful. Now? I’m so thankful to be in a better place, mentally, of course, but that experience, & what I see about it in retrospect, has helped me to recognize the lows for the other gifts they give. It got me through four months of unemployment, & it will get me through a hell of a lot more. I truly think that once you can learn to see the lows as not just necessary & devastating but beautiful & lesson-learning, you can get through just about anything. Including dirty dishes. <3
From Amber from Girl with the Red Hair:
Your house is so cute!
We are currently searching for our first townhome. And while we both really really really want a dishwasher (currently live in an apartment without one) I know it’s not top of our list. Because one day we will have one.
I have been saying “I hate this apartment” too much lately to Eric and wishing, hoping, waiting for when we can buy our home. You’re right, I need to embrace the lows along with the highs. What a great idea for 2011 :)
From KJ:
love the house lauren! coming from a girl in minneSNOWta, i know how much it sucks to live in a drafty house in the winter. p.s. LOVE your blog. i found you from reading heir to blair! and i just started one myself!
From Tiera:
Aww man, I have a dishwasher and NEVER use it! It’s my dish-drying rack, lol!
PS: Your house is SO cute!
From Nora:
I want to come visit you, in case you didn’t know. I love the look of that house! I lived in several apartment buildings that were old so I was used to drafts and no dishwashers. I actually prefer to do dishes by hand believe it or not, after three years of no dishwasher. I must be crazy.
I love the idea of embracing the highs/lows of a year… I’m definitely working on letting go, letting flow, and with that I assume would come me not worrying so much, or at least not caring, about the lows quite so much. Lovely post and reminder!
From Ana:
I had to lol at the simple and poorer times part. I never had a dishwasher growing up (hippie parents ha) and I ended up buying a 55 yr old drafty house without one when I was 22. Crazy what some of us get used to. I’m glad you are looking on the brighter side!
From San:
Oh, how I miss a dish-washer! I haven’t had a dish-washer in 2,5 years and I never realized how much of a difference it made until I had to do all my dishes by hand!
Thank you for this eye-opening piece of work! :)
From Jill:
Great post and so appreciative of your “embraceful” (not even a word!) attitude.
From Mary:
I love this, because it’s so true. I catch myself playing the comparison game more often than I care to admit…it’s a very slippery slope. Here’s to both of us doing appreciating ALL that life has to offer this year :)
From Amy:
Oh my goodness…I just spent an hour reading through all your posts, and I LOVE you! You seem so down-to-earth, sweet and funny. Your writing is amazing — you have such a way with words; it’s so enjoyable to read, and I now feel like you are a childhood friend or something. This post in particular hit home with me, because my boyfriend and I moved into an old house this past summer and have literally ran into all the same problems! Dishwasher doesn’t work, the insulation (or lack thereof) sucks and everything is so expensive to fix, on top of the crazy bills/rent. And the cherry on top is that I’m a notorious worrier! Haha. My boyfriend and I have agreed to try and take things one day at a time this year, though. Life is too short to only focus on negative things…but it’s refreshing to see that everyone else has problems too (and I’m glad I’m not the only one who is constantly comparing myself to others and coming up short). You are a breath of fresh air, Lauren! I’ll definitely be back for more! :D